Friday, May 20, 2011
Turning FEAR into FREEDOM
Yesterday I spent an hour telling 141 people who registered for my FEAR to FREEDOM Birth Facilitator Training how much I believe we can change the culture of birth. Did I tell them it would be easy? No. Do I think I've found the secret ingredient? Yes and...
Let me explain. The way I see childbirth today pregnant moms have to play a big part in the shift towards a more mother-centered birth paradigm. We can get upset with OBs and hospitals and insurance companies...and I do think the shift needs to come from these and other forces as well...but the bottom line is that pregnant mothers need to take responsibility for their birth experiences. They need to own it. And right now most are not. Most pregnant moms are sitting in FEAR, big time.
And when you're in fear you are not FREE. Fear and Freedom rarely mix.
On the call yesterday I told the story of a woman named "Carol" in my recent pregnancy tele-course who wanted a natural birth, but also knew that where she lives the hospital is not used to supporting mothers to do it naturally. Carol was not able to be on our weekly live calls for the class because she worked during the day. But through the at-home exercises and through listening to the class recordings at 36 weeks she wrote me this:
” I went to register at the hospital and was really disappointed at the reaction to my desire to have a drug free natural birth even though I knew it wasn’t common at that hospital...(no one has requested the squat bar since they moved into this new facility- which was over a year ago...). I decided to use this experience as a “Body, voice, action” moment. So right there, in the way you taught me, I connected to the current in my body, found my authentic voice, and took some serious action! I officially requested the squat bar, told them I was bringing a doula with me, and walked out there feeling like this birth was MINE…and even if I decide to take drugs when I’m in labor NOBODY is taking my power away. I know I rock!”
This is what fear to freedom means to me. It means getting pregnant women like Carol to take the chains off their hands and legs and own their birth power no matter the outcome. Again, I’m not saying it will be easy - anyone who works in childbirth today knows all the forces that push against pregnant mothers to have empowered birth experiences (and I don't think an empowered birth is only a natural birth) – but what I am saying is that fear and freedom are choices in pregnancy (and in life!).
Let's teach pregnant moms to choose freedom! A pregnant mother always has a choice of her internal power: she can blow out her internal power and be fearful or keep her internal power source lit by choosing freedom. Changing the culture of childbirth is not about getting the perfect birth - it's about teaching pregnant moms how to have an empowered birth experience, which I believe lifts us up as a culture.
The problem is we haven't developed a comprehensive language and method to teach pregnant moms how to move from fear to freedom. I think it's time. That's why my FEAR to FREEDOM Birth Facilitators training combines the three main ingredients I think pregnant moms need to own their births: connection to their BODY, finding their authentic VOICE, and the tools to take ACTION.
My FEAR to FREEDOM Birth Facilitator training program pre-launches June 7. You can register now if you work with pregnant moms and want to receive this training...or if you're a pregnant mom in the fall contact me to find a certified FEAR to FREEDOM Birth Facilitator near you. So far registration is all over the world from Georgia to Dubai!